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Archive for 08/14

I'm not even sure what to think now.
So I am just another occupant in this house
That you can just come in and leave as you please.

Then make plans without intentions of including me.

Don't you think it's too much?
What am I now?

Am I supposed to assume this is normal?
Like I won't notice that we don't spend any time at all?
And that little time is just to redeem yourself?

Don't do me a favour.
Do yourself a favour.
You know what you are doing.
You know what are the consequences.

Your holiday is almost over
And the dream is gonna shatter when reality hits.

I won't be home when you need me.
I'm not gonna be there if you only notice my presence
When you need my help.

I was never a saint.

My love always did come with a price.
In the end, it's not my loss, even if it hurts.

- Miss-Hanz.Blogspot.com -
Miss-Hanz™ is a registered blog. All Copyrights Reserved.©

Sorry but I can't accept it.
To my jealous eyes it's disgusting.
It requires so much energy to pretend it's okay.
Don't come back to me when it's over.

I'm not home.
  - Miss-Hanz.Blogspot.com -
Miss-Hanz™ is a registered blog. All Copyrights Reserved.©

Back here again.
Living in a house full of people but still alone somehow.
Maybe it's not people around me but myself.
Maybe I have some alien need for attention and love.
That nothing but full attention fits the bill.

Or maybe I just feel under appreciated.
I'd like to know what I have done is something
That they may be grateful for.
Something that makes them think
"Wow she did so much, damn nice la."
Then proceeds to bring me out for dinner
In gratitude once in a while.
I don't want to be repaid,
Just have my love returned.
Not because you owe me,
But because you love me, too
As much as I do.

Now this is probably PMS talking,
But as I am sitting here cleaning this house,
Thinking what a god damn awesome wife I would make
Which is a surprise to me when really lol
I was never the "wife".
I was the "maid", a sub character,
Never the main.

Wow what crap is that.
LOL I can talk rubbish when I don't think and type lol.

Gonna start work soon,
And The Muse pays me to work from home.
It's not much but it's still something.

Living by myself have been great,
I have to parent myself,
And realise how unhealthy I am.
I have yet to start exercising,
But at least I know I can take care of myself.
The only problem is whether I want to get off my butt to do so.

I hate fleeting and feeble friendships.
I don't like knowing I can be replaced just like that.
I don't like seasonal friends.

Kels, you've really spoiled me.
I'm not replacing you but somehow I am finding for a relationship
Such as yours.
Something time and distance cannot corrode.

All my endeavours so far has been met with utter disappointment.
Never again will I so lightly say I found another kelsey.
Ian blasted that to bits.

Everything is superficial until situation proves otherwise.
That should be my motto now.

Because more often than not,
Things are too good to be true.

Including you.

  - Miss-Hanz.Blogspot.com -
Miss-Hanz™ is a registered blog. All Copyrights Reserved.©